When A Woman Batters A man
Come to think of it, when a man violates a woman, it is called battery and domestic violence. Right? But when a woman batters a man,what is this called?
Some thirty-seven years ago, your mother’s distant cousin requested for yours truly to live with him and his family.
Your mother’s cousin roars like a lion and almost everyone trembles except mother. You prayed and fasted that the cup will pass over but the prayers were not answered unfortunately.
Surprisingly, you had thought your uncle was a lion until you realized he was a mere chicken, in fact puppet where his wife was concerned.
He only roared just to be feared by people and underneath the facade was a vulnerable man who needed help.
Usually,you drink water in the middle of the night and several nights, you would hear sobs and silent wails coming from the master bedroom. Out of curiosity one day, you decided to peep through the door hole.
Shocked and disbelief were understatements as you saw your uncle on his knees, carrying a side table in raised hands (As in, being punished by his wife) and being battered with horse whip.
If it were to be today, one could explain that it was probably a turn on in 50 shades of grey for them.
You almost yelled and suddenly felt weak when a hand tapped your shoulder. It was one of their four children, who later explained that her mother has always beaten her father,slapped and does whatever her mood permits.
Unintentionally, your mother got wind of it when she forced you to go back after you had already made up your mind to stay with your mother.
And Bob’s your uncle as the terror of a wife was driven out of the house by forces greater than her.
To the present, several men had complained in customary courts of being battered, violated and inflicted with not only bodily but emotional pain.
Yet no one is listening or believing their stories and some of them have been scorned and shamed to their face.
Not only women are victims of domestic violence, some men are also victims but out of shame and pride,they keep silent.
Why would any man be subjected to violence even when his creation was meant to be manly?
You got to hear of how another man was beaten black and blue by his wife for coming home late.
Nkan mbe in late kolawole Olawuyi’s voice(the popular Nigerian TV anchor who presented strange but true stories in the early 2000).
No government foresees this trend. No security agencies arrest these women because the society has shushed these men.
According to online statistics one in 10 men in the United States have experienced contact sexual violence, physical violence, or stalking by an intimate partner during their lifetime and reported some form of related impact.
Is there no jail term for any woman who maltreats a man?
A recent funny but true story of how an undergraduate was beaten blue and black by his girlfriend and her accomplice for daring to date another girl.
If such girl finally gets to marry someone else, the violent lifestyle may never leave and she could be another man beater.
This calls for serious thought because the situation is gradually becoming endemic. Many men are suffering but are forced to put a smiling face out of fear and what would people say.
A man once said, he ended his marriage same day, when he realized that his wife was becoming aggressive, domineering and abusive. He may have been lucky to pull out of an unpleasant situation. What then happens to those who do not have the liver to pull out.
Some women may not be abusive physically but emotionally.That alone could be a dagger in the heart.
Everyone should be able to say No to domestic violence in whatever form.
See you next week Sunday